Tallmadge head football coach Joe Vassalotti teaches literature classes when he's not on the field.
Come again?
A person who enlightens his students with the finer points of William Shakespeare's sonnets also tells some of those same students to whip an opposing player's rear end?
Yes, it's safe to say you can probably hear Mr. Vassalotti reciting the words "How do I love thee? Let me count the ways ..." by British poet Elizabeth Barrett Browning to his students in the classroom.
And on the football field, you can probably hear Coach Vassalotti say things like "Knock his block off!" or some other jargon that can only be heard on the gridiron.
Maybe I live on another planet, but I find this to be a bit odd.
Ah, but literature and football are such wonderful things because they often deal with irony.
I never imagined something like this before, but now it makes perfect sense.
Literature, especially poetry, and football go hand in hand.
With the Blue Devils' commanding 31-14 victory over Green Oct. 24 at Rossiaky Stadium, it would be easy to consider the city of Tallmadge as "The City of the Big Shoulders" much like Carl Sandburg's description of a certain windy city in the classic poem, "Chicago."
The football players' "big shoulders" carried the Blue Devils to the postseason for the fifth consecutive year.
But Tallmadge's reputation as a powerful force looked rather gloomy after six games.
The Blue Devils lost a heartbreaking 21-20 decision to Cloverleaf which dropped their record to 3-3.
At that point, I thought of another British poet who had a far more skeptical approach to life than Ms. Browning.
"My name is Ozymandias, king of kings: Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!"
Percy Bysshe Shelley certainly had a valid point.
Whether it dealt with an imposing Egyptian ruler or an incredibly successful football team, everyone, no matter how great or powerful he or she appears to be, is a mere mortal.
Tallmadge, however, now has a pretty solid argument against the brutally honest poet.
The Blue Devils went on to win their next four games and seem to be ruling the opposition with an iron fist.
So maybe Tallmadge no longer has a seat on the Suburban League throne.
Highland, which earned a 3-2 win over the Blue Devils earlier in the season, ended Tallmadge's reign and is the league's new emperor.
But the Blue Devils don't resemble Ozymandias either.
With a trip to the playoffs a reality, Tallmadge's football program is not a "colossal wreck, boundless and bare."
The game with Green certainly had a literary feel.
As numbers on both the jerseys and the field vanished due to wet, muddy conditions, Robert Frost came to mind.
"I have been one acquainted with the night. I have walked out in rain -- and back in rain."
Now that Tallmadge has overcome the odds and reached the postseason yet again, Vassalotti the football coach may want to become Vassalotti the literary expert when it comes to the Blue Devils' next game.
A Knute Rockne speech may be the choice for most football coaches in a do-or-die situation.
But this football coach may want to consider a certain 20th century British poet as he tries to motivate his team.
And who knows?
Maybe Dylan Thomas has already played a significant role in Vassalotti's speeches since the loss to Cloverleaf.
"Do not go gentle into that good night. Rage, rage against the dying of the light."
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